Right, choices, good and bad ones. You mortals all make them, the downside to my having given you all freewill I suppose. The skill in choice making is knowing how to turn those bad choices into something worthwhile. Something I'm pretty good at. The only decision I made which might be considered "bad" would have to be the fact that I decided (yes, decided) to win that sperm race a wee bit over 18 years ago (as you can tell, I turned that into something worthwhile)Hmph.
Can't think of any other bollocksed up choices on my part. So let's have a look at the world in general.
1) Modern France (actually France in general). wdf guyz?
2) Christianity. Refer to the diagram up top to understand why.
3) Electing Hitler. Right, now I understand them Germans were rather annoyed at having to fork out all that extra cash for the Allies just because they got their asses handed to them the first time around. But managing to democratically elect this nutjob just cause you're frustrated at the rest of the world? How'd that work out for you?
4) The Internet. Look what we turned it into: gossip and porn.
5) AIDS. Yeah, someone, somewhere decided to fuck a monkey, and now we're supposed to deal with a continent of people dying due to this illness.
6) People not wearing condoms even though everyone (sans Catholics) knows it's a lot safer if you do. No STDs, and a bigger bonus, no fucking annoying children!
7) Israel. Whose bright idea was it to put a Jew haven in the middle of 200 million Muslims who don't want them there?
8) Deliberately typing like a retard with overly fat fingers (admittedly some such people exist who can type (you know who you are, dear)), why do you do it? Will having to push an extra 2-3 keys strain you so badly?
9) Not moving away from Malta if you have the chance.. WHY?!
10) Chain-smoking at what's about to be a crime scene then leaving all the buds there for your DNA to be processed, and, as a result, getting caught.
11) Voting for Bush.
12) Voting for Bush the second time.
13) Taking up an offer of candy from a 50-something year old with a moustache.
14) Going to a transvestite fashion contest and having one slip and fall on you.
15) Getting drunk and roaming around alone in search of more alcohol, needing someone to point out blood gushing from the back of you head.
Well, that's just a short list of silly choices with dire consequences, which of course could all have easily been avoided. Now I can't expect everyone to be more like me, and frankly I'd rather you didn't. But please try to be less stupid, aye?
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